I will continue to add to this blog when I feel I have the energy or inclination to do so.
My days are quietly at home resting due to Chronic fatigue syndrome and Fibromyalgia. I spend time with my 4 fur babies and after all the years of stress , trauma and uncertainty, I am happy to be quiet at my home. Watching TV which I hardly ever watched and pottering in my garden. I have made the peace for myself by making better.💙 choices.
Thursday, 8 September 2016
FRIENDSHIPS LOST
The years 2006 till 2016. lost 4 dear friends from cancer and it was awful, I miss Leni, Pat, Des and Dee. To be continued...
2011 ISRAEL HERE I COME.
In 2011, I was lucky enough to go to Israel for 6 weeks and it was paid for by a friend yet again. I had a great time in Israel and will comment on that also in the near future.
MAWANDAS ARRIVAL APRIL 2008
Eventually Mawanda got a fiancee visa to come to Australia April 8th 2008. It was so nice meeting him again after 18 months of meeting him in Uganda. We met at the airport and came home to my place. We of course talked for hours and then became the journey of culture shock for Mawanda. We planned our wedding for the 31st of May 2008 and we had a beautiful day with friends who helped with the wedding and they too have vanished . Why people do this I dont know so it was myself and Mawanda alone. It was quite tough with different values and Mawanda not handling money very well. He however got a job after 3 months and has worked ever since. He is now a foreman. We broke up once and got back together. But due to finances we split up in 2015 as I had gone bankrupt in 2011 and Mawanda was still not handling money well. So we are now seperated but he visits me every weekend and does allot for me. He still wants to get back with me but that would take allot for me to do that now. I enjoy my own company and dont have all the hassle with money that he still has . I rather have it the way it is now. A friendship and carer for me. He is not interested in meeting anyone else. He doesnt, drink or smoke or going out socially. He is social phobic and just visiting myself is his outing, He enjoys talking the dogs he loves out for a drive or a walk. So thats where we are now September 2016. I feel at peace now.
MEHTAL HEALTH GROUP I HELPED RUN. 2000 to 2006
Before I go into the next story of Mawanda and myself, I helped to run a mental health group from 2000 to 2006 and it was nice to meet people who had mental health issues and yet they all abandoned me when I went to Uganda with other friends also. Very sad. But from the mental health group I began to have a stalker and this young man kept arriving at my door and sending me mail. I got very scared and had to have the police involved and my phone number changed and a restraining order. He did it again when Mawanda arrived 8th April 2008. So he got involved and thankfully he has not been in touch sinse. I helped this young man out and he got obsessed with me. So I learnt a lesson and wont do that again.
HOPE AN ANGEL
I am not sure if I repeat myself but if I do I am sorry. At 70 years old it is hard to remember.
When I got back to Australia after meeting Mawanda in Uganda I had culture shock myself and found myself feeling guilty when eating good food. I had put my story on to a blog I can no longer find but some one read it and I got an email from a complete stranger from USA who wanted to buy the air ticket for Mawanda to come to Australia.I at first thought it was a scam of some sort and was very scepital about it.
But one morning I woke up and there was an email from Hope telling me that there was something for me at the Post Office. I went there and low and behold there was $2000 in cash with a message from Hope saying hope you have an engagement and happy wedding. I just cried and could not beleive it. That was the beginning of all the hassle of getting Mawanda to Australia. I had to borrow money on credit cards for the visas that had to be paid. But I was so thankful to Hope for her caring spirit. Hope and I got very close and were in contact nearly every day.💜. One day soon after Hope phoned me to tell me she had been attacked and hurt very badly by her daughter. Details I will not go into. But Hope was badly hurt. She was in hospital for a few days and her daughter was in a security place? I felt so so shocked and sad that this had happened to such a caring person. In November 2007 Hope came to visit me for 6 weeks. We got on so well and not a cross word the whole 6 weeks. It was like we were soul sisters. We had a nice time together. Hope was in contact with Mawanda and yet they have not met yet? Hope also came to court to help me get Mawanda here and we won the appeal. I felt sad to see Hope go home. I love her very much.💚 and we are still in contact.
When I got back to Australia after meeting Mawanda in Uganda I had culture shock myself and found myself feeling guilty when eating good food. I had put my story on to a blog I can no longer find but some one read it and I got an email from a complete stranger from USA who wanted to buy the air ticket for Mawanda to come to Australia.I at first thought it was a scam of some sort and was very scepital about it.
But one morning I woke up and there was an email from Hope telling me that there was something for me at the Post Office. I went there and low and behold there was $2000 in cash with a message from Hope saying hope you have an engagement and happy wedding. I just cried and could not beleive it. That was the beginning of all the hassle of getting Mawanda to Australia. I had to borrow money on credit cards for the visas that had to be paid. But I was so thankful to Hope for her caring spirit. Hope and I got very close and were in contact nearly every day.💜. One day soon after Hope phoned me to tell me she had been attacked and hurt very badly by her daughter. Details I will not go into. But Hope was badly hurt. She was in hospital for a few days and her daughter was in a security place? I felt so so shocked and sad that this had happened to such a caring person. In November 2007 Hope came to visit me for 6 weeks. We got on so well and not a cross word the whole 6 weeks. It was like we were soul sisters. We had a nice time together. Hope was in contact with Mawanda and yet they have not met yet? Hope also came to court to help me get Mawanda here and we won the appeal. I felt sad to see Hope go home. I love her very much.💚 and we are still in contact.
Monday, 18 July 2016
YEAR 2000 TO 2006
I moved from a womens violence house to a Community Housing House in Gawler South in April 2000. It was great I would have a safe place to live for the rest of my life. It is a 60 yr old semi detached brick house but had been renovated and had a nice new kitchen and bathroom so I was very happy.
I made the place my own and had my 2 cats Tara and Jasper and Henry my pekingese. He unfortunately was only 4 yrs old and died only a few months after I moved in. He had hurt his spine and it could not be fixed. I was so sad and didnt get another dog for 6 months and had Maggie my Shitzu given to me around November 2000. She was a beautiful dog and died in 2009 aged only 10 years old. She had a heart problem. I still miss her. I miss Henry too.
I also had to have my teeth out and a new plate put in and that was the start of false teeth which I still dislike, in 2002. In 2003 I went to Melbourne for a few days with my friend Pat to a Chronic Fatigue Conference. It was very helpful. Sadly Pat died in 2004. I miss her so much.💚. I also lost my dear friend Jan in 2006 of cancer. Of all my friends she was always.💚 there for me and visited me often even when she was not well. I miss her so so much. Then I lost Leni and Dee both from cancer. It has been a sad time for me. I did a bit if clairvoyant work during this time but kept to myself as wanted to leave all the hurt behind.
I made the place my own and had my 2 cats Tara and Jasper and Henry my pekingese. He unfortunately was only 4 yrs old and died only a few months after I moved in. He had hurt his spine and it could not be fixed. I was so sad and didnt get another dog for 6 months and had Maggie my Shitzu given to me around November 2000. She was a beautiful dog and died in 2009 aged only 10 years old. She had a heart problem. I still miss her. I miss Henry too.
I also had to have my teeth out and a new plate put in and that was the start of false teeth which I still dislike, in 2002. In 2003 I went to Melbourne for a few days with my friend Pat to a Chronic Fatigue Conference. It was very helpful. Sadly Pat died in 2004. I miss her so much.💚. I also lost my dear friend Jan in 2006 of cancer. Of all my friends she was always.💚 there for me and visited me often even when she was not well. I miss her so so much. Then I lost Leni and Dee both from cancer. It has been a sad time for me. I did a bit if clairvoyant work during this time but kept to myself as wanted to leave all the hurt behind.
UGANDA, MUMBAI INDIA AND HOME.
After six weeks in Uganda it was time to go home and it was very sad. Mawanda cried so hard and myself and the children were in tears. Mawanda had his biological daughter Latifah, and had adopted 3 siblings who had lost their parents so he had Umaru, Medi and Shadia. They were in boarding school. Nothing like you would think a boarding school would look like. Some looked like our old hen houses. But the children got fed and schooled for a price. Mawanda being a policeman had to do that.
So he was a single man bringing up 4 children. I admire him for that.
I flew from Kampala to Ethiopia and onto Mumbai. I had a day and night and half another day there so had booked a hotel room. When I got there all I wanted was a hot shower. I got under the shower to find it was cold. But being so hot I didn't care, I so enjoyed that shower after six weeks of a bucket bath. So wonderful it felt. I was very tired.💚 and it was only around 3pm in the afternoon so I tried to sleep but couldnt so got up and dressed and decided to explore. I was near the Arabian sea so decided to head that way. I wandered around and bought a few nick nacks and a Indian outfit. Then I wandered down to the sea which was a dirty brown colour. I walked in the water and then wandered along the beach. Suddenly it went dark and it was around 6pm. I soon realized I was lost and could not find my way back. I wandered down various streets and little lanes and was getting very scared and anxious. It was over 2 hours of walking. Suddenly an angel appeared in the shape of a little boy. I gave him the name of my hotel and he took me back. I asked him to sign his name but he couldnt write. He was about 8 years old. So I gave him some money and he was thrilled. I was greeted at the door of the hotel with the staff worried I had had something happen to me. They were relieved to see me . They offered me a meal in the restaurant. Well there were about 8 young Indian men all dressed up in black and white all wanting to please me. I found it hard to eat with them all watching me. I asked if I could have my dessert in my bedroom and it was delivered there. It was a nice meal, 3 course about $5.00 in all. I slept well that night. I had a nice breakfast and walked around the hotel garden. Soon it was time to go to the airport and the taxi arrived and I got there on time. I made sure I had rupees on me and got good service getting my wheel chair and onto the plane as didnt want to be left alone like It was on my way over. I had a good flight to Dubai and had another long wait in their rest room area and a meal. I soon was on my way onto Adelaide and arrived home safe and sound. It took me 2 weeks to get over the jet lag as chronic fatigue syndrome kicked in big time, I had to rest and dream.
So he was a single man bringing up 4 children. I admire him for that.
I flew from Kampala to Ethiopia and onto Mumbai. I had a day and night and half another day there so had booked a hotel room. When I got there all I wanted was a hot shower. I got under the shower to find it was cold. But being so hot I didn't care, I so enjoyed that shower after six weeks of a bucket bath. So wonderful it felt. I was very tired.💚 and it was only around 3pm in the afternoon so I tried to sleep but couldnt so got up and dressed and decided to explore. I was near the Arabian sea so decided to head that way. I wandered around and bought a few nick nacks and a Indian outfit. Then I wandered down to the sea which was a dirty brown colour. I walked in the water and then wandered along the beach. Suddenly it went dark and it was around 6pm. I soon realized I was lost and could not find my way back. I wandered down various streets and little lanes and was getting very scared and anxious. It was over 2 hours of walking. Suddenly an angel appeared in the shape of a little boy. I gave him the name of my hotel and he took me back. I asked him to sign his name but he couldnt write. He was about 8 years old. So I gave him some money and he was thrilled. I was greeted at the door of the hotel with the staff worried I had had something happen to me. They were relieved to see me . They offered me a meal in the restaurant. Well there were about 8 young Indian men all dressed up in black and white all wanting to please me. I found it hard to eat with them all watching me. I asked if I could have my dessert in my bedroom and it was delivered there. It was a nice meal, 3 course about $5.00 in all. I slept well that night. I had a nice breakfast and walked around the hotel garden. Soon it was time to go to the airport and the taxi arrived and I got there on time. I made sure I had rupees on me and got good service getting my wheel chair and onto the plane as didnt want to be left alone like It was on my way over. I had a good flight to Dubai and had another long wait in their rest room area and a meal. I soon was on my way onto Adelaide and arrived home safe and sound. It took me 2 weeks to get over the jet lag as chronic fatigue syndrome kicked in big time, I had to rest and dream.
CULTURE SHOCK
I now understand what culture shock is as I felt it when I arrived in Uganda and also when I got home, I couldnt eat good food for a time. It made me feel guilty for eating and thinking of poor children starving.
Seeing a child laying in the street while the mother begged for food. It was terrible.
Mawanda also suffered with culture shock when he arrived in Australia and took him around 5 years to get used to the western culture. This is something that stressed our marriage.
Seeing a child laying in the street while the mother begged for food. It was terrible.
Mawanda also suffered with culture shock when he arrived in Australia and took him around 5 years to get used to the western culture. This is something that stressed our marriage.
UMARU THE YOUNG BOY WHO IS NOW A MAN
Umaru was my little guide in Uganda and we would walk around the village together. I had bought him a transitor radio and as there was no power and I had no computer it got a little quiet at times. So I had wrapped a electrical telephone cord around my case from Australia to hold it together. So Umaru took this cord and some how hooked it up to the battery radio and connected it to 2 old speakers being used as a table. Lo and behold we had music in our bedroom and one in the other room. So I bought many batteries to keep it going.
Kitty was a white so so skinny cat that Umaru had and it was living on a little rice. I used to feed him with my food when no one was looking. Kitty used to go next door and up into the roof looking for birds or something else to eat. The man next door said if that cat comes over again I will shoot him. So I made lead out of two of my belts and Kitty was then kept tied up if out side. He was allowed off lead inside. Not being desexed he naturally wanted to wander. Kitty apparently lived for a few years and then died.
There was a high wall around Mawandas house and I used to sit on the wall and watch people go by. You would never be lonely in Uganda. The look on the faces of these people when they saw a 60 yr old white lady with red hair was priceless. There would be men and women with various goods on their heads, material, cooking utensils, clothes and many other types of goods to sell. It was amazing. Also small monkeys would sit in the trees and watch me. I could just go back there again. It opened my eyes so much and inspired me to be a better person.
Kitty was a white so so skinny cat that Umaru had and it was living on a little rice. I used to feed him with my food when no one was looking. Kitty used to go next door and up into the roof looking for birds or something else to eat. The man next door said if that cat comes over again I will shoot him. So I made lead out of two of my belts and Kitty was then kept tied up if out side. He was allowed off lead inside. Not being desexed he naturally wanted to wander. Kitty apparently lived for a few years and then died.
There was a high wall around Mawandas house and I used to sit on the wall and watch people go by. You would never be lonely in Uganda. The look on the faces of these people when they saw a 60 yr old white lady with red hair was priceless. There would be men and women with various goods on their heads, material, cooking utensils, clothes and many other types of goods to sell. It was amazing. Also small monkeys would sit in the trees and watch me. I could just go back there again. It opened my eyes so much and inspired me to be a better person.
THE BAD, THE SAD AND THE GLAD IN UGANDA
I met a man in Uganda who said he was a pastor and had a small house and a large tent with many woman and children. I visited him a few times and gave him money. Mawanda told me to be careful who I talked to and gave money to, but the adventurer in me didnt listen. When I got back home to Gawler South Australia, I got a newspaper article sent to me over the Internet. This man was a child molester and was jailed for abuse of woman and children. I was heart broken and all I could think of was those poor woman and children.
Yet the children had happy smiles and yet some had sad eyes. I could tell by looking at them the ones who hurt the most and those who were happy. What you dont know or dont have means you dont miss it. They just were happy to see a white lady be kind to them.
Bless those children.
Yet the children had happy smiles and yet some had sad eyes. I could tell by looking at them the ones who hurt the most and those who were happy. What you dont know or dont have means you dont miss it. They just were happy to see a white lady be kind to them.
Bless those children.
LIFE IN UGANDA
The time I had in Uganda for 6 weeks was an unique experience. One day I decided to buy Umaru a bike and we went into the city on the bus and had a look around. I bought him a small transitor radio and some clothes. Then we went looking for a old second hand bike. They were so expensive around $100 for a second hand bike. After about 4 hours of walking we got one and had to get a taxi home . A old type car bumped up the old red dirt road to Mawandas place. I was exhausted but had made a little boy so happy, having his own bike.
Ashia was Mawandas cousin and she did most of the cooking and cleaning and we got on well. She was facinated with my red hair and helped me put in a rinse I had bought with me. This also facinated her. I ended up giving most of my clothes and make up to Aisha. She came to me one day and asked for something for her period. I was amazed as being 60 I didnt need anything like that so went out and bought her some pads. I dont know what she used to use? Nothing I suspect. Thats what I would take if I ever went again.
I would walk around the village and all the children would follow me liked the pied piper. So I would sit in the dirt and play games with them. They just loved it and I would make up games for them. On my last day in Uganda, I took Aisha to show her what a random act of kindness was and gave clothes away to the first woman I saw. The reactions where priceless as they were not used to this. I had a much lighter suit case going home.
I went to the Equator and to the zoo and various other places in Kampala the capital of Uganda.
My stay was amazing and one I will never forget.
SIX WEEKS IN UGANDA
From now on as I am in the last 10 years of my life till now, I will not go into the nitty gritty of anything or anyone as they are still important people in my life and I dont wish to comment on too many negative things in case I get sued. Just to cover myself,
I had a nice time in Uganda. I had days of going out visiting various places and other days staying at home and walking around the villages. On one trip to the Equator I had an experience that changed my heart. We set off on a small bus about a 10 sitter and it went very fast up and down the steep hills. I was sitting in the front with Mawanda and it was very scary. It was nice to see where the equator line was and to see the small stalls and have a drink in a small shop. It was about a 2 hour drive.
On the way back the bus stopped and a distraught young mother got in with a very sick baby. She sat right in front of me and I couldn't help but put my arms around her and pat the babies head. The baby was about 10 months old and was very hot. So I gave the mother my water bottle for her to give to the baby which she did. Mawanda was touching the baby's foot and whispered to me. She has just died. I was so upset but the mother didnt know and just kept holding it crying. I stayed sitting close to the mother processing what had just happened and was thankful the baby got a drink before she died. The people in the bus went quiet and the bus driver took her to a small hospital type clinic. The poor mother would then be told the baby was dead.
It just showed me how fragile life can be and how precious life is. I learnt a lesson about life and death that day.
I felt my health was much better in Uganda. The pain and fatigue was less and I enjoyed the warm weather. I think it is because there is not so much technology and electrical things around to interfere with the magnetic fields around my body. Plus I was eating natural food. I basically lived on fruit , beans and rice. .
I had a nice time in Uganda. I had days of going out visiting various places and other days staying at home and walking around the villages. On one trip to the Equator I had an experience that changed my heart. We set off on a small bus about a 10 sitter and it went very fast up and down the steep hills. I was sitting in the front with Mawanda and it was very scary. It was nice to see where the equator line was and to see the small stalls and have a drink in a small shop. It was about a 2 hour drive.
On the way back the bus stopped and a distraught young mother got in with a very sick baby. She sat right in front of me and I couldn't help but put my arms around her and pat the babies head. The baby was about 10 months old and was very hot. So I gave the mother my water bottle for her to give to the baby which she did. Mawanda was touching the baby's foot and whispered to me. She has just died. I was so upset but the mother didnt know and just kept holding it crying. I stayed sitting close to the mother processing what had just happened and was thankful the baby got a drink before she died. The people in the bus went quiet and the bus driver took her to a small hospital type clinic. The poor mother would then be told the baby was dead.
It just showed me how fragile life can be and how precious life is. I learnt a lesson about life and death that day.
I felt my health was much better in Uganda. The pain and fatigue was less and I enjoyed the warm weather. I think it is because there is not so much technology and electrical things around to interfere with the magnetic fields around my body. Plus I was eating natural food. I basically lived on fruit , beans and rice. .
FIRST DAY IN UGANDA
After getting back from the police station to report my stolen computer, I was exhausted and went straight to sleep and woke up again like when I arrived the night before with candles burning., in the middle of the night. I needed a shower and soon found out there wasnt one. I had also found out there was no working toilet or running water or electricity. So Mawanda bought me a small bowl of warm water and luckily I had my own soap and washer and towel. So I had a much needed wash squatted on the floor of the small bedroom. I felt so much better having a wash and it would be six weeks before I next had a shower, and washed in a small basin every day. My chronic fatigue kicked in for the first week so we didnt go out much, just a few gentle walks around the village. Mawanda had Aisha who cooked most of the meals over a fire outside. Umaru was 13 years old and he became my guide allot of the time when Mawanda was at work as a policeman. Water had to be bought at a little old shop in the village and I ate mainly rice, beans and the odd piece of meat or fish. That was about it. There was plenty of fresh fruit but too expensive for those in the village, so I bought my own mangos, pineapple and jac fruit. I was hanging out for my coffee and thankfully I had got some sachets on the plane, until I could get to the city of Kampala and buy some coffee and other things, I needed.
After a week I felt much better and Mawanda took me on day trips on small taxis like small rattling old buses. We went to the River Nile by bus some of the way and the rest on a boda boda a small motor bike.
After a week I felt much better and Mawanda took me on day trips on small taxis like small rattling old buses. We went to the River Nile by bus some of the way and the rest on a boda boda a small motor bike.
Thursday, 16 June 2016
MEETING MAWANDA JULY 2006.
I arrived at Entebbe airport Uganda at around 10pm at night. I was last off the plane as there was no wheelchair and I had long steps to walk down. I went to Customs to check out and I could not see anyone I knew. But once I went through customs, I had 2 huge suitcases and carry on luggage to try to push on a old trolley. Then I heard a yell Pamela Pamela and it was Mawanda giving me a hug and a kiss and taking the trolley. I was so exhausted, but was also hyped up as well in my head as I was finally there. It seemed like an hour from air port to Mawandas place. I could see houses with candle lights on..
My first impression of Mawanda was how skinny he was. The house was alight with candles and mosquito net over the bed. It looked romantic. But the next day I found out there was no electricity or running water or flush toilet.
When I opened my bag to change my clothes I found my laptop had been taken. I was so upset and told Mawanda I had to report it to get notification that it had been stolen for my insurance claim.
So after not much sleep, after breakfast fruit , I walked with Mawanda to the bus stop to get the bus into Kampala. As I sat on the bus I felt them touching my red hair. When we got to the city Kampala, it was a very long walk to the Police station. So suddenly Mawanda calls boda boda, a small motor cycle arrives and I get put on one and Mawanda got on another. The drivers decided to have a race as having a white woman on was something to show off to their friends. I hung on for dare life and my red hair was flying in the air. I was scared but at the same time exciting. When I got off I said that was horrible but nice.lol. Mawanda was perplexed. Lol.
We then went back to Mawandas place by a car taxi and I went to bed. I was exhausted and needed sleep. It was nice and warm after leaving cold Adelaide so I slept well
My first impression of Mawanda was how skinny he was. The house was alight with candles and mosquito net over the bed. It looked romantic. But the next day I found out there was no electricity or running water or flush toilet.
When I opened my bag to change my clothes I found my laptop had been taken. I was so upset and told Mawanda I had to report it to get notification that it had been stolen for my insurance claim.
So after not much sleep, after breakfast fruit , I walked with Mawanda to the bus stop to get the bus into Kampala. As I sat on the bus I felt them touching my red hair. When we got to the city Kampala, it was a very long walk to the Police station. So suddenly Mawanda calls boda boda, a small motor cycle arrives and I get put on one and Mawanda got on another. The drivers decided to have a race as having a white woman on was something to show off to their friends. I hung on for dare life and my red hair was flying in the air. I was scared but at the same time exciting. When I got off I said that was horrible but nice.lol. Mawanda was perplexed. Lol.
We then went back to Mawandas place by a car taxi and I went to bed. I was exhausted and needed sleep. It was nice and warm after leaving cold Adelaide so I slept well
2006 OFF TO UGANDA I GO ALONE.
My life in the 2000s was complicated with ill health and visiting specialists and in therapy . I still see them both today. In 2005 I met Mawanda in Uganda. I never knew where Uganda was and had to look it up. At around the same time I got a phone call from Ben in South Africa, the love of my life. He was a ill man and had heart problems. But he wanted to come and live his days out with me.But this never happened as he died. I never will forget him and have his photo above my bed. Just a small one.
So while I was talking to Mawanda I had Ben in the background.
But eventually after Mawanda kept emailing me and sending me photos and saying he wanted to meet me, .He wasnt worried about the 28 year old age difference or the fact I was ill, with a disability. So I borrowed money fron the Bank and in July 2006 I went to Uganda via wheelchair to Uganda,. I booked my own fare and did my whole fare there and back.
Some of my friends thought I was crazy, but I wasnt scared. I liked adventure. My only concern was my animals and I was able to get a friend to stay in my house for just over 6 week's.
I had to have various injections and medication for malaria and my own medications were also with a Drs letter from my GP.
I flew from Adelaide to Darwin and from Darwin to Mumbai India. I had a 15 hour wait in Mumbai and I was left sitting in my wheel chair by the baggage check out. It was dirty and humid., There was another woman in a robe also waiting and we managed to explain to each other when we wanted to go to the toilet, and watched each others luggage. It was a squat toilet and I nearly fell over and found it hard to get up.
I weighed about 3kgs heavier as I had a long grey coat made with pink inside. I looked like a Galah. But I had many pockets sewed inside and I had tissues,thooth brushes, thooth paste and anything I thought I could take to give away. A good idea I thought but quite heavy for me.
After About 10 hours I got taken upstairs to a nice lounge where I could lay out and rest. I should of been there from the beginning. I found the Indians rude as they would push me unless I gave them money. I had no Indian rupees or US dollars. I made sure on my way back I did, and I got good treatment then.
After leaving India I flew to Dubai. It was nice there and was taken to a nice lounge to rest and wait for another 12 hours. I was also taken to a nice restaurant for 2 nice free meals. I had all these waits as was a very cheap fare. I dont know if I would do it again.
From Dubai I flew to Kenya and a short flight to Uganda. .Two days latter I arrived in Uganda from Australia.
So while I was talking to Mawanda I had Ben in the background.
But eventually after Mawanda kept emailing me and sending me photos and saying he wanted to meet me, .He wasnt worried about the 28 year old age difference or the fact I was ill, with a disability. So I borrowed money fron the Bank and in July 2006 I went to Uganda via wheelchair to Uganda,. I booked my own fare and did my whole fare there and back.
Some of my friends thought I was crazy, but I wasnt scared. I liked adventure. My only concern was my animals and I was able to get a friend to stay in my house for just over 6 week's.
I had to have various injections and medication for malaria and my own medications were also with a Drs letter from my GP.
I flew from Adelaide to Darwin and from Darwin to Mumbai India. I had a 15 hour wait in Mumbai and I was left sitting in my wheel chair by the baggage check out. It was dirty and humid., There was another woman in a robe also waiting and we managed to explain to each other when we wanted to go to the toilet, and watched each others luggage. It was a squat toilet and I nearly fell over and found it hard to get up.
I weighed about 3kgs heavier as I had a long grey coat made with pink inside. I looked like a Galah. But I had many pockets sewed inside and I had tissues,thooth brushes, thooth paste and anything I thought I could take to give away. A good idea I thought but quite heavy for me.
After About 10 hours I got taken upstairs to a nice lounge where I could lay out and rest. I should of been there from the beginning. I found the Indians rude as they would push me unless I gave them money. I had no Indian rupees or US dollars. I made sure on my way back I did, and I got good treatment then.
After leaving India I flew to Dubai. It was nice there and was taken to a nice lounge to rest and wait for another 12 hours. I was also taken to a nice restaurant for 2 nice free meals. I had all these waits as was a very cheap fare. I dont know if I would do it again.
From Dubai I flew to Kenya and a short flight to Uganda. .Two days latter I arrived in Uganda from Australia.
EMMANUEL FROM 2000 UNTIL TODAY.
I met Emmanuel on line in 1999 and he was in a Refugee Camp in Ghana. I had him checked out by Unicef and a Pastor who had met him in the camp. So I knew he was for real and not leading me on. He became like a son to me . He also had his young 10yr old sister Agnes with him. I sent him money when I could afford it and so wanted to help him. I tried to get him out to Australia on a refugee visa but it was refused due to my being on Disability Support Pension back then. I was very upset and constantly worried about them both. They sent me letters and photos.
Emmanuel saw his whole family beheaded by the Taylor Rebels in the 90s. His father worked for the Government. He was made to drink the blood from his mother's head. It makes my skin crawl. He was beaten by the Rebels and has a very bad leg which is a disability to him now.
Emmanuel managed to get away from the Rebels and took his sister to the Liberian port hoping to get a boat to somewhere safe. An old man saw Emmanuel and Agnes laying on the ground at the ships dock. He gave his ticket and some money to let them get on the boat that was about to leave. That is how he got to be in Ghana. They were sent to the refugee camp where they lived for over 10 yesrs. Agnes got an illness and she died aged 13years old. I was so upset and now Emmanuel was all alone.
He calls me Mum. The only other thing I could do was to save up enough money to send him back to his home country Liberia which was now safe for him to go. It took me a long time but in August 2011 I sent him $1000 I had saved and he is now back in Liberia. I am so proud I was able to do something for him. I still hear from him and would love it if one day I could meet him in person. I cant afford to send money anymore and he understands that.
I just pray that anyone reading this wants to help him , I would take donations to do that, Just so he can eat and get medical treatment for his leg.
I think of Emmanuel very often.
I love him like a son.
Emmanuel saw his whole family beheaded by the Taylor Rebels in the 90s. His father worked for the Government. He was made to drink the blood from his mother's head. It makes my skin crawl. He was beaten by the Rebels and has a very bad leg which is a disability to him now.
Emmanuel managed to get away from the Rebels and took his sister to the Liberian port hoping to get a boat to somewhere safe. An old man saw Emmanuel and Agnes laying on the ground at the ships dock. He gave his ticket and some money to let them get on the boat that was about to leave. That is how he got to be in Ghana. They were sent to the refugee camp where they lived for over 10 yesrs. Agnes got an illness and she died aged 13years old. I was so upset and now Emmanuel was all alone.
He calls me Mum. The only other thing I could do was to save up enough money to send him back to his home country Liberia which was now safe for him to go. It took me a long time but in August 2011 I sent him $1000 I had saved and he is now back in Liberia. I am so proud I was able to do something for him. I still hear from him and would love it if one day I could meet him in person. I cant afford to send money anymore and he understands that.
I just pray that anyone reading this wants to help him , I would take donations to do that, Just so he can eat and get medical treatment for his leg.
I think of Emmanuel very often.
I love him like a son.
CLAIRVOYANT READINGS AND MORE?
In 2003 I went to Melbourne with my friend Pat to a Chronic Fatigue Conference. We stayed with an other chronic fatigue sufferer along with a few others who also stayed at her place. We had a nice time there. However I got my plane time mixed up and ended up having to stay in a hotel until I could get another flight. Thats what cfs and Fibromyalgia does to your brain you get a foggy muddled brain.
But I was low in funds when I got back and I decided to go back to doing clairvoyant readings for awhile, but after time my health gave out and I knew I could no longer keep giving out to others.
I had met a man quite a few years my junior who came for a reading and we began an secret affair. He was married and due to the situations I will not go into details. I just enjoyed his company and we had wonderful sex. This went on for about 4 years until I broke it off.
I knew I just couldnt be a mistress anymore.
I forgive myself for doing what I did,
He just made me feel special.
But I was low in funds when I got back and I decided to go back to doing clairvoyant readings for awhile, but after time my health gave out and I knew I could no longer keep giving out to others.
I had met a man quite a few years my junior who came for a reading and we began an secret affair. He was married and due to the situations I will not go into details. I just enjoyed his company and we had wonderful sex. This went on for about 4 years until I broke it off.
I knew I just couldnt be a mistress anymore.
I forgive myself for doing what I did,
He just made me feel special.
ICU 2009 MY LIFE WAS SAVED.
June 2009 was a very bad year for Mawanda and myself. I was on ms contin for fibromyalgia pain and I mis judged the dose and took too many. Mawanda came into the bedroom and found me unconcious and he could not wake me up. He carried me to the little old car we had and drove me to Gawler Hospital where they pronounced me dead. But a nurse felt a pulse in my finger and they worked on me again. I was rushed to to the Royal Adelaide Hospital where I was in ICU for 2 weeks. Mawanda was told I may never walk or talk again if I made it. I was in hospital for 4 weeks and came home with no effects at all. My memory was good and I could walk and talk. Mawanda saved my life. When I got home Mawanda had to tell me Maggie my little dog had died beside my bed. I was heart broken and Maggie was buried in the garden.
Then I got the swine flu in the October of 2009 and was very ill. Then end of November 2009 I broke my ankle in 3 places and was laid up, so Dembe my new puppy eat my books in the book shelve. I then got a blood clot in my broken ankle leg and was in hospital in December 2009 to 2010. So this was a very bad year. I had a near death experience which I will tell another time. I am just so thankful to be alive.
Then I got the swine flu in the October of 2009 and was very ill. Then end of November 2009 I broke my ankle in 3 places and was laid up, so Dembe my new puppy eat my books in the book shelve. I then got a blood clot in my broken ankle leg and was in hospital in December 2009 to 2010. So this was a very bad year. I had a near death experience which I will tell another time. I am just so thankful to be alive.
POOR HENRY IN COMES MAGGI LATE 2000.
I moved into the house I am still in today 16 years latter. I was very exhsusted with all the moving and drama of 1999. So it was nice to be in a 60 yr old house that had been renovated.Being a Community house I will have a place to live for the rest of my life. Tara and Jasper my cats and Henry my pekingeses dog settled in well. One morning not long after moving in I found Henry who was only 4 years old laying on the floor unable to move. I tried to move him and he yelled. I ran to a neighbor, I hardly knew and she took me straight to the vet. The prognosis was not good and I left the vets with Henry's body .He could not be saved and had to go to God. I was in so much shock, and was ill for days. I managed to bury him in the garden. I had lost 3 dogs in a year. Just too much.
I decided no more dogs and went around 9 months with just Tara and Jasper my 2 cats. Then I got lonely for another dog and contacted the lady who breeds Pekingeses and would give them away to a good home. Val came up with Maggi who was a Shitzu, Maltese cross and was only 6 months old. She had been mistreated by small children so she was very timid at first but became a wonderful active little dog. This was around the end of 2000.
I had started dating an old ex boyfriend who I met at a Country Music event. He was still the same old Neville who smoked heavy and had to drink 6 beers a night. He was very much in love with me and I hoped the relationship would work? He bought me another puppy, I called Liberty. Maggi was needing company and that is why he bought her. She was born 4th of July 2002 hence her name Liberty Belle.I tried so hard to stay with Neville but when he had a heart attack and would not give up smoking or drinking it got too me. He had a bad turn at my place after he had had a stent put in and I had to rush him to hospital. This scared me and I knew I and my health could not cope with his behavior and this was affecting my health, so around 2003 I broke it off with him. He was living with his mother so he had a place to go. He has never forgiven me. I only wish him well.
I decided no more dogs and went around 9 months with just Tara and Jasper my 2 cats. Then I got lonely for another dog and contacted the lady who breeds Pekingeses and would give them away to a good home. Val came up with Maggi who was a Shitzu, Maltese cross and was only 6 months old. She had been mistreated by small children so she was very timid at first but became a wonderful active little dog. This was around the end of 2000.
I had started dating an old ex boyfriend who I met at a Country Music event. He was still the same old Neville who smoked heavy and had to drink 6 beers a night. He was very much in love with me and I hoped the relationship would work? He bought me another puppy, I called Liberty. Maggi was needing company and that is why he bought her. She was born 4th of July 2002 hence her name Liberty Belle.I tried so hard to stay with Neville but when he had a heart attack and would not give up smoking or drinking it got too me. He had a bad turn at my place after he had had a stent put in and I had to rush him to hospital. This scared me and I knew I and my health could not cope with his behavior and this was affecting my health, so around 2003 I broke it off with him. He was living with his mother so he had a place to go. He has never forgiven me. I only wish him well.
CLOSET SPACE THE CD
1999 was a bad year with the end of my 4th marriage and moving twice in 10 months and loosing my 2 Pekingeses Nakita and Scarlett. But admist all of that I was asked to appear in a dvd to be made about Parents of Gay children.
It was a cold July day and wet and I had to go by train and bus to be at Parkside by 8am. I remember dragging myself out of bed and with much fatigue and pain. Pulling a trolley with clothes to change into for the filming. However I managed to get there and the adrenaline kicked in and I was able to get through the long day. Till about 6pm.
It was filmed in a beautiful old bed and breakfast house and Simon Royal from ABC was the interviewer. It was a great experience and the dvd came out well. I feel very proud of it.
It can be bought at various stores and also in many libraries.
It is called CLOSET SPACE.1999.
When I got home, I was in bed for a week , so ill, I could hardly move and yes alone again.
It was a cold July day and wet and I had to go by train and bus to be at Parkside by 8am. I remember dragging myself out of bed and with much fatigue and pain. Pulling a trolley with clothes to change into for the filming. However I managed to get there and the adrenaline kicked in and I was able to get through the long day. Till about 6pm.
It was filmed in a beautiful old bed and breakfast house and Simon Royal from ABC was the interviewer. It was a great experience and the dvd came out well. I feel very proud of it.
It can be bought at various stores and also in many libraries.
It is called CLOSET SPACE.1999.
When I got home, I was in bed for a week , so ill, I could hardly move and yes alone again.
BIRTHDAYS
As I grew up with not
having birthdays or Christmas I never got used to receiving as I got older. I always found it easier to give.When I first worked at Jenny Craig in the early 80s I was given a gift of a porcelain doll as a Birthday gift , I had a cry. I still have the doll.
So for my 40th some of my back there friends gave me a 40th Birthday with a surprise stripper. It was embarrassing but fun. That was my first birthday party.
So when Larry was not drinking he did have a kind heart and in 1996 he and his 2 daughter's gave me a surprise 50th party. This was so unreal and nice as it would be one of the last times I had time with my son Neb and his gay friends. I had a nice time. So I appreciated very much for having a second party.
In 2001 I gave myself a 55th birthday party at my place. Friends Darrel and Graham sang for me. Pat Ashton bought her Olympic torch for us to hold and have our photos taken. It was a lovely day. Pat passed away a few years latter. Her sister was married to an ex Governor General. I miss her very much.
I went to Government House on a couple of occasions to do a few readings. I was friends with the Chafferuer who lived in the cottage on the Government House grounds.
So I am so happy I had 3 birthday parties in my whole life.
Namaste.
having birthdays or Christmas I never got used to receiving as I got older. I always found it easier to give.When I first worked at Jenny Craig in the early 80s I was given a gift of a porcelain doll as a Birthday gift , I had a cry. I still have the doll.
So for my 40th some of my back there friends gave me a 40th Birthday with a surprise stripper. It was embarrassing but fun. That was my first birthday party.
So when Larry was not drinking he did have a kind heart and in 1996 he and his 2 daughter's gave me a surprise 50th party. This was so unreal and nice as it would be one of the last times I had time with my son Neb and his gay friends. I had a nice time. So I appreciated very much for having a second party.
In 2001 I gave myself a 55th birthday party at my place. Friends Darrel and Graham sang for me. Pat Ashton bought her Olympic torch for us to hold and have our photos taken. It was a lovely day. Pat passed away a few years latter. Her sister was married to an ex Governor General. I miss her very much.
I went to Government House on a couple of occasions to do a few readings. I was friends with the Chafferuer who lived in the cottage on the Government House grounds.
So I am so happy I had 3 birthday parties in my whole life.
Namaste.
Wednesday, 15 June 2016
4th MARRIAGE BREAK UP AND WHY.
End of 1998 I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, which I knew nothing about , but after research on the net I then knew what I had been suffering all ny life. The light bulb went off. I learnt stress made symptoms worse and I was so stressed at my son having nothing to do with me and trying in all ways to communicate with him to get the phone slammed on me or door as well. As the crow flys he is only 5 minutes away from me. This has gone on from 1997 until after 10 years and just had to let go. My prayer is my son comes to his senses before I die. I can do no more.
So realizing I could not do anything about my son, I could about my horrible marriage. Larry had a secret I knew nothing about until we married. When he moved into my place his wardrobe suddenly became full of womens vynl clothes and he was for ever buying me long shinning boots and clothes and making me wear them. I soon got sick of all of this. Then out come the pornographic videos of sexual acts in vynl clothes. I kept asking him to stop to get rid if it all, but he refused. My Dr was encouraging me to get rid of him as it was causing my health to worsen. He just would not go.
One evening very late I woke up and found him drunk laying on the lounge with his pants down for all to see and the pornographic video going. A whole cask of wine had been drunk.This did it I told him he had to get out but he still wouldnt go.
So I decided to take his 4 boxes of pornographic videos and bags of his vynl clothes and gave them to my neighbour to keep. I then told Larry I had got rid of them but he could have them back once he left. Well the next weekend he arrived with his daughters and their horse floats to take his share of furniture. Once the girls left he demanded his boxes of x rated stuff. First I told him they had been burnt, well he was so upset it was unreal. So I went next door and he got his precious stuff. It just showed how important they were to him. He had a real fetish and probably still has.
But at last I was free of him and would just have to go through property settlement and all that goes with it., including divorce yet again.
That was around early 1998. We had bought the house I was renting with the money I got from my brothers estate and I had not wanted to do that. But like all abuse he bullied me into doing that.
So I was able to get Domestic Violence house in Elizabeth and moved there for around 9 months while the house sold. He got his block of land and the BMW car and I ended up with no car and $5000 that was it. I was once again poor.At least the divorce went smoothly. It was while I was in Elizabeth I lost my 2 pekingeses Nakita and Scarlett, and remained with Henry and got 2 kittens, Tara and Jasper..
In early 2000 I was offered a Community Housing House with Unity housing back in Gawler, so I took it knowing it would be a permanent place to live the rest of my life.
So realizing I could not do anything about my son, I could about my horrible marriage. Larry had a secret I knew nothing about until we married. When he moved into my place his wardrobe suddenly became full of womens vynl clothes and he was for ever buying me long shinning boots and clothes and making me wear them. I soon got sick of all of this. Then out come the pornographic videos of sexual acts in vynl clothes. I kept asking him to stop to get rid if it all, but he refused. My Dr was encouraging me to get rid of him as it was causing my health to worsen. He just would not go.
One evening very late I woke up and found him drunk laying on the lounge with his pants down for all to see and the pornographic video going. A whole cask of wine had been drunk.This did it I told him he had to get out but he still wouldnt go.
So I decided to take his 4 boxes of pornographic videos and bags of his vynl clothes and gave them to my neighbour to keep. I then told Larry I had got rid of them but he could have them back once he left. Well the next weekend he arrived with his daughters and their horse floats to take his share of furniture. Once the girls left he demanded his boxes of x rated stuff. First I told him they had been burnt, well he was so upset it was unreal. So I went next door and he got his precious stuff. It just showed how important they were to him. He had a real fetish and probably still has.
But at last I was free of him and would just have to go through property settlement and all that goes with it., including divorce yet again.
That was around early 1998. We had bought the house I was renting with the money I got from my brothers estate and I had not wanted to do that. But like all abuse he bullied me into doing that.
So I was able to get Domestic Violence house in Elizabeth and moved there for around 9 months while the house sold. He got his block of land and the BMW car and I ended up with no car and $5000 that was it. I was once again poor.At least the divorce went smoothly. It was while I was in Elizabeth I lost my 2 pekingeses Nakita and Scarlett, and remained with Henry and got 2 kittens, Tara and Jasper..
In early 2000 I was offered a Community Housing House with Unity housing back in Gawler, so I took it knowing it would be a permanent place to live the rest of my life.
OFF TO NEW ZEALAND WITH 4TH HUSBAND IN 1998.
All was not good in my relationship with Larry but in spite of all the pain and fatigue I was suffering, I stayed in it for the love of my two little step grandchildren. I was forever having to go to bed and in extreme pain all the time.The stress made it worse. Larry was a drinker which I did not realize until I married him along with some other very disturbing behavior which I will devuldge latter. When I went to New Zealand in 1997 to meet Aunty Lois, Neb my son stayed with Larry. I noticed a change in my son when I got back but to this day felt something had happened to him while staying with Larry.?
One day , the day Princess Diana died my son told me he wanted nothing to do with me and gave no reason and I havent seen him in 20years now. I will get back to thix issue also latter.
Larry and I decided in 1998 to go to New Zealand to do a tour of the North Island. We stayed with Aunty Lois again and went out and about with them. I was able to find the garden and house where my father had died. This was also healing for me. But the joy of it all was taken away by Larrys drinking behavior and constantly embarrassing me. It was horrible. But it was good to see Aunty Lois and Uncle and also Aunty Lorna as the 3 of them passed away not long after my last visit. So sad.
One day , the day Princess Diana died my son told me he wanted nothing to do with me and gave no reason and I havent seen him in 20years now. I will get back to thix issue also latter.
Larry and I decided in 1998 to go to New Zealand to do a tour of the North Island. We stayed with Aunty Lois again and went out and about with them. I was able to find the garden and house where my father had died. This was also healing for me. But the joy of it all was taken away by Larrys drinking behavior and constantly embarrassing me. It was horrible. But it was good to see Aunty Lois and Uncle and also Aunty Lorna as the 3 of them passed away not long after my last visit. So sad.
MEETING THE AUNTY I NEVER KNEW AND HER FAMILY. NEW ZEALAND 1997.I
I find writing my life story there are always things I remember when hearing the news or someone elses story. If I ever get this book published it will have quotes and books that got me through hard times and those who inspired me.
Now back to meeting my Aunty Lois. Her cousin Aunty Lorna picked me up at Auckland airport. Lorna lived in a very wealthy area of Auckland and I spent a few days with her resting hearing stories about my family especially my father whom I never knew. It was very interesting to me. I found also my father had an older brother called, Gordon and I did searches and found he lived not far from Lorna in a nursing home and he had only died a few years back. They didn't even know that, Lorna or Aunty Lois.
Aunty Lois had not even told her own children my biological cousins, that myself and deceased brother Les existed until now. So they were quite excited to know about me and to meet me. Aunty Lois husband was also still alive and also knew my father well as served in World War Two together. So after having a rest Aunty Lorna drove myself up to Whangarei, north of Auckland to meet her. Aunty Lois had no idea I was coming but the rest of the family knew. When I arrived Aunty Lorna went in first and said to Lois "Guess who I have here"? and pulled me through the door. Well the look on my Auntys face was priceless, she was so shocked at first and then cried and hugged me and wouldn't let go of my hand. She sat down cuddling me and holding my hand and said she had not seen me since I was 2 years old in a old nightgown. Why I had not been talked about all these years I dont know but I was robbed of not knowing my biological cousins all these years.
The day after I arrived one of my boy cousins and his wife held a party for myself and for Aunty Lois 80th birthday. It was a great day and I got to meet my 1st, 2nd, and 3rd cousin's. There were children everywhere and one especially looked just like myself when I was five years old.
I only stayed just less than a week as didnt know what reception I would get when I booked my fare. But it was all good and Aunty Lois and my uncle took me out and about in the car to show me around. My Uncle was over 80 and a terrible driver. I was scared many times.lol. However my Aunty Lois wanted me to curl up in bed with her in the mornings and talk. This was the first time in my life at 50 that I felt like what it was like to feel a family connection. This was very healing for me and a sense of peace came over me after all these years of searching for my father. I never got to hug my father but his sister was the next big thing. My Aunty Lois bought me a Maori doll as a gift and I treasure that doll.
After I came home I kept in contact with my cousins over the net but that has now faded away and I only hear from my cousin Sheryl who lives in Dunedin New Zealand. She and her husband visited me once on a trip to Australia. So thats my story on my family reunion in a nutshell.
Now back to meeting my Aunty Lois. Her cousin Aunty Lorna picked me up at Auckland airport. Lorna lived in a very wealthy area of Auckland and I spent a few days with her resting hearing stories about my family especially my father whom I never knew. It was very interesting to me. I found also my father had an older brother called, Gordon and I did searches and found he lived not far from Lorna in a nursing home and he had only died a few years back. They didn't even know that, Lorna or Aunty Lois.
Aunty Lois had not even told her own children my biological cousins, that myself and deceased brother Les existed until now. So they were quite excited to know about me and to meet me. Aunty Lois husband was also still alive and also knew my father well as served in World War Two together. So after having a rest Aunty Lorna drove myself up to Whangarei, north of Auckland to meet her. Aunty Lois had no idea I was coming but the rest of the family knew. When I arrived Aunty Lorna went in first and said to Lois "Guess who I have here"? and pulled me through the door. Well the look on my Auntys face was priceless, she was so shocked at first and then cried and hugged me and wouldn't let go of my hand. She sat down cuddling me and holding my hand and said she had not seen me since I was 2 years old in a old nightgown. Why I had not been talked about all these years I dont know but I was robbed of not knowing my biological cousins all these years.
The day after I arrived one of my boy cousins and his wife held a party for myself and for Aunty Lois 80th birthday. It was a great day and I got to meet my 1st, 2nd, and 3rd cousin's. There were children everywhere and one especially looked just like myself when I was five years old.
I only stayed just less than a week as didnt know what reception I would get when I booked my fare. But it was all good and Aunty Lois and my uncle took me out and about in the car to show me around. My Uncle was over 80 and a terrible driver. I was scared many times.lol. However my Aunty Lois wanted me to curl up in bed with her in the mornings and talk. This was the first time in my life at 50 that I felt like what it was like to feel a family connection. This was very healing for me and a sense of peace came over me after all these years of searching for my father. I never got to hug my father but his sister was the next big thing. My Aunty Lois bought me a Maori doll as a gift and I treasure that doll.
After I came home I kept in contact with my cousins over the net but that has now faded away and I only hear from my cousin Sheryl who lives in Dunedin New Zealand. She and her husband visited me once on a trip to Australia. So thats my story on my family reunion in a nutshell.
Wednesday, 8 June 2016
FINDING MY FATHERS SISTER 1996
As I had never known my biological father and had found out he had died aged 55 in 1969, I still wondered about him and wondered if he had siblings or other children. So now I had a computer I started searching. It was very complicated but I kept going and got documents and fisch type papers from New Zealand. Some looked like exray type paper. One day I was looking through some sent to me from the New Zealand army and managed to see with a magnified glass the name of Lois Wilson sister on it. So I started searching for her. It took about a year of searching and the times I would phone New Zealand and say are you my Aunty Lois., to be told no. Then one day I got an email from someone in New Zealand who saw my search posts and he put me onto her in Wangarei in New Zealand. I phoned her and it was her. I was so excited and found I had a Aunty Lorna who was a distant cousin also in her late 70s. Aunty Lois was turning 80 in 1997. So Aunty Lorna helped me to fly to New Zealand to meet her as a surprise .
1990s Go On
I spent time involved with country music and dated a few men, but had been on my own for 15 years since my third marriage broke up. So I was reading self development type books and thought I was ready for another committed relationship.
So Went on line and meet Larry. He seemed a nice man and he took me out and used to help him out in the Coffee shop he had bought. He had retired from his job and got a big package. No he doesnt buy a house, but bought a BMW, block of land and a coffee business. I met him as he was just setting himself up in his coffee shop. It didnt take me long to find out he was in financial trouble with the cafe. This was in 1994.
I suddenly found myself in very dysfunctional family yet having to always go out to family get to gethers. This is when my chronic fatigue syndrome and fibromyalgia got worse as he was a drinker and I had to drive. I became very close to his grandchildren and loved having them stay over. They were only babies and used to love their Nana Pam. I got on okay with his 2 daughters but found it streasful to always.💚 have his ex wife at social events and family gatherings.
I had no long before met up with my brother Les who came to live in Gawler. He was a truck driver and a binge drinker. I was always getting calls to bail him out from somewhere. He was diagnosed with diabetes and he thought it was the end of the world. In 1995 Larry and I decided to get married. I now know looking back it was the biggest mistake yet again. Just when you have no family and you get so lonely on your own you just think it is right at the time. So we had a big wedding and on our honeymoon, I realized, I wasnt in love with him but loved him as I knew him. So I was in this relationship and just got on with it. I had got a computer in 1994 so was teaching myself how to use it so I got to meet many good friends which helped me get through the dynamites of his family, trying to support my alcoholic brother my only full biogical sibbling and he had never lived near me for 30 years. He used to live near our mother. So I was getting to see how bad he was.
My health began to go down hill again I had severe pain and fatigue and when I wasn't drsgging myself around the constant family events and arguments, I was minding my step grandchildren and I loved them dearly and that was why I stayed so long with him. They loved their Nana Pam. I still miss them.
So Went on line and meet Larry. He seemed a nice man and he took me out and used to help him out in the Coffee shop he had bought. He had retired from his job and got a big package. No he doesnt buy a house, but bought a BMW, block of land and a coffee business. I met him as he was just setting himself up in his coffee shop. It didnt take me long to find out he was in financial trouble with the cafe. This was in 1994.
I suddenly found myself in very dysfunctional family yet having to always go out to family get to gethers. This is when my chronic fatigue syndrome and fibromyalgia got worse as he was a drinker and I had to drive. I became very close to his grandchildren and loved having them stay over. They were only babies and used to love their Nana Pam. I got on okay with his 2 daughters but found it streasful to always.💚 have his ex wife at social events and family gatherings.
I had no long before met up with my brother Les who came to live in Gawler. He was a truck driver and a binge drinker. I was always getting calls to bail him out from somewhere. He was diagnosed with diabetes and he thought it was the end of the world. In 1995 Larry and I decided to get married. I now know looking back it was the biggest mistake yet again. Just when you have no family and you get so lonely on your own you just think it is right at the time. So we had a big wedding and on our honeymoon, I realized, I wasnt in love with him but loved him as I knew him. So I was in this relationship and just got on with it. I had got a computer in 1994 so was teaching myself how to use it so I got to meet many good friends which helped me get through the dynamites of his family, trying to support my alcoholic brother my only full biogical sibbling and he had never lived near me for 30 years. He used to live near our mother. So I was getting to see how bad he was.
My health began to go down hill again I had severe pain and fatigue and when I wasn't drsgging myself around the constant family events and arguments, I was minding my step grandchildren and I loved them dearly and that was why I stayed so long with him. They loved their Nana Pam. I still miss them.
THE 1990S GOES ON
The 90s were no different than the rest of my life, full of ups and downs. I had been single for 15 years after my third marriage and was in therapy and reading many self help books. I was also very clairvoyant and was doing readings from home prior to the 90s and through the 90s. I was doing readings up until 2010 when I gave it away due to my health. I had a good name in this area and was well know psycic and worked with the police on a murder case.
I became quite a recluse around 1993 and listened to alot of talk back on radio. I met a friend call Dee and we met and became friends for many years until she died in Ohio in 2015 of cancer. I had a bad experience with a talk back announcer who phoned me at home and screamed at me about something I had said on air. This shattered me and I got phone phobia. I however still listen to talk back.
After my bad experience with the Emissaries I was off any sort of spiritual place except my own beliefs . I just decided after 15 years on my own I try dating again, not flings but a serious relationship and thought after all my therapy and reading self help books I wouldnt pick a dead beat man as I had before or an a abusive one. Abuse comes in many forms and I have experienced all, physical, emotional, financial, and all other forms of abuse, . So I thought I could find a nice caring man, who would not be abusive. How wrong I was.
My brother Les whom had never lived near me came to live in Gawler near me after our mother died. So he was my only biological sibling and it was nice in one way to get to know.💚 him after 20 or so years. But he was an alcoholic and would binge drink and I was always getting calls to bail him out from somewhere. He was a truck driver and owned his own rig. This was very stressful for me. I now know what my mother had put up with for so many years.
I became quite a recluse around 1993 and listened to alot of talk back on radio. I met a friend call Dee and we met and became friends for many years until she died in Ohio in 2015 of cancer. I had a bad experience with a talk back announcer who phoned me at home and screamed at me about something I had said on air. This shattered me and I got phone phobia. I however still listen to talk back.
After my bad experience with the Emissaries I was off any sort of spiritual place except my own beliefs . I just decided after 15 years on my own I try dating again, not flings but a serious relationship and thought after all my therapy and reading self help books I wouldnt pick a dead beat man as I had before or an a abusive one. Abuse comes in many forms and I have experienced all, physical, emotional, financial, and all other forms of abuse, . So I thought I could find a nice caring man, who would not be abusive. How wrong I was.
My brother Les whom had never lived near me came to live in Gawler near me after our mother died. So he was my only biological sibling and it was nice in one way to get to know.💚 him after 20 or so years. But he was an alcoholic and would binge drink and I was always getting calls to bail him out from somewhere. He was a truck driver and owned his own rig. This was very stressful for me. I now know what my mother had put up with for so many years.
Sunday, 22 May 2016
GAWLER 1990s
I bought a business after my son went to live with his father at aged 14. After all he didnt have to pay board or do anything, so money speaks louder than words. I was lost all on my own again. The Buisness was called The Natural Way and I worked 6 days a week. I was the counselor, the Accountant, Cleaner. You name it and I did it all.
I also became the PR person for the newly formed Gawler Country Music Club, which I was on the first Committee of this club. It was an exciting time and kept my mind off missing my son. When I wasnt working in my buisness, I was organizing Country Music Event's and going out with bad men. Hence as some abused children do is I became promiscuous yet again and dated around 4 younger men until I had my nervous breakdown early 2003.
I tried smoking dope and was on the go from dawn to midnight. Good way to put all the hurt and sadness behind me and to forget I had no family and no support. I felt so alone in the middle of the chaos.
As the days and weeks went by and I was back and forth to Perth to be with my dying mother.
Eventually my body could not take anymore and I collapsed at work and was hospitalized for short time. I had to weigh up the options and that was second time I had to go bankrupt. I was very good at my job and many people lost a lot of weight. I would counsel up to 15 people a day.💜. But my health had to come first.
Thats when I took a trip to Sydney and took Neb, with me.💙. So he got another outing with myself. His father never took him anywhere. Just handed out the money.
If Neb ever looks back all the places he has been has been with myself. I went into therapy and still see my therapist a couple of times a year.
I became a recluse and only went out to the Dr or take my beloved dogs for a walk.
I had blue heeler cross labrador, the biggest dog I have had. It was Nebs dog but hiz father would not let him take his dog, so I cared for him. I loved Kuri and it broke my heart when I had to take him to the vet to go to God. He had a large cancerous tumours on his liver and I just could not save him. Neb never understood that and still blames me for killing his dog.
I was left with Nakita and Scarlett., my 2 Pekingeses.
The 90s were no better.💙 than the rest of my life.
I also became the PR person for the newly formed Gawler Country Music Club, which I was on the first Committee of this club. It was an exciting time and kept my mind off missing my son. When I wasnt working in my buisness, I was organizing Country Music Event's and going out with bad men. Hence as some abused children do is I became promiscuous yet again and dated around 4 younger men until I had my nervous breakdown early 2003.
I tried smoking dope and was on the go from dawn to midnight. Good way to put all the hurt and sadness behind me and to forget I had no family and no support. I felt so alone in the middle of the chaos.
As the days and weeks went by and I was back and forth to Perth to be with my dying mother.
Eventually my body could not take anymore and I collapsed at work and was hospitalized for short time. I had to weigh up the options and that was second time I had to go bankrupt. I was very good at my job and many people lost a lot of weight. I would counsel up to 15 people a day.💜. But my health had to come first.
Thats when I took a trip to Sydney and took Neb, with me.💙. So he got another outing with myself. His father never took him anywhere. Just handed out the money.
If Neb ever looks back all the places he has been has been with myself. I went into therapy and still see my therapist a couple of times a year.
I became a recluse and only went out to the Dr or take my beloved dogs for a walk.
I had blue heeler cross labrador, the biggest dog I have had. It was Nebs dog but hiz father would not let him take his dog, so I cared for him. I loved Kuri and it broke my heart when I had to take him to the vet to go to God. He had a large cancerous tumours on his liver and I just could not save him. Neb never understood that and still blames me for killing his dog.
I was left with Nakita and Scarlett., my 2 Pekingeses.
The 90s were no better.💙 than the rest of my life.
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